The importance of the early weeks of care for a newborn

A gift from the heavens.

(My baby Ned just a few hours old)

I saw something on Sunday that continues to sadden me.

You see, in the Sunday social pages, there was a photo of a well known (in both Australia and the UK) celebrity and her now equally well known partner at a large week-long boating and racing social event on an island in North Queensland.

Of course, this event looked like massive fun and the photos showcased a smorgasboard of other famous faces who had joined this pair to party.

But the thing that really made the heckles on my motherly neck rise, was the (highlighted) fact that this particular couple have a 6 week old baby who was also in attendance on the island.  It read somewhat as though they deserved congratulations for bringing the bub along.

Of course, I don't know their particular situation and there could be lots of really great reasons why they decided to hang out up there. Work. Holiday. Getting away from paparazzi.  Charity, perhaps.  I hope so. 

My first assumption though (remembering that assumptions are naughty things that sometimes get us into trouble, but I'll share my thoughts anyway) was that this couple wanted to prove to themselves and the world that having a baby would not compromise their lifestyle; that having a baby was no big deal; that their child would learn to fit into their life and schedules and not the other way around. 

If this were the case, heading off to a social event like this with a 6 week old in tow could be a perfect example of how it can be done.

Assumptions ARE naughty, aren't they. And possibly completely wrong, but my little brain has been busy filing arguments against my own assumptions!!

 I'll put forward my arguments here, for you to judge.

Having a child IS a big deal

Many women over the age of 35 who don't yet have children will attest to the point that having a child is not something to be taken for granted. Falling pregnant, maintaining a pregnancy and having a live healthy birth are not rights, but are in fact, a privilege.   So, it must be said that if a pregnancy is successful and results in a newborn child, it IS a big deal. Something that you want to celebrate by igniting fireworks into the evening sky and posting on the front of every newspaper, whether you are famous or not.   The other thing is that the act of growing a child inside of you is also a big deal.  It takes a lot out of you, it does drain your energy and you do need replenishment.  And it takes time for this replenishment to happen.  In my opinion, six weeks is not enough time.  3 months at least and mum and bub would both be off to a flying start. 

A baby does change our life

It has been said that 'having a baby is like forever having your heart walk around outside of you' (or something like that).  It is true.  From the moment of conception, our life as we know it changes.  We eat food we don't normally like or throw up after our faves, our body morphs and grows into this unfamiliar beast (or beauty-depending on our thinking), we suddenly love 8.30pm bedtimes and naps and staying home (nesting) becomes a real treat. The labour and birth itself is but a transition.  A newborn adds the surprise element. Hopefully, we already feel something akin to love but our hormones kickstart a tiger instinct and God help anyone who tries to get in our way.  Breastfeeding helps, of course, in fine-tuning this instinct but it is in all of us.  Most mothers feel a primal need to keep the newborn within eye-sight in order to keep watch and protection over their young.  In the newborn to three month stage,(and for some mama's, this stage lasts one or two years) a mother often ditches any semblance of a social life in order to provide a safe and secure home-life and some form of healthy predictability, a rhythm of sorts.  The baby takes priority and mother willingly forgoes some of her usual pleasures, finding a new pleasure in striving to do their best ever for their most beloved human kin.  I'm not sure how any mother of a new born willingly leaves them in the care of someone else, even if it is only for an hour in the care of the world's best nanny or your own mum, for something as trivial as a party.  

I remember attending my sister's wedding when Ned was six weeks old. My only goal for this day was to ensure that whatever I wore would provide easy access for breast feeding. My entire being was consumed with my need to care for, and protect, this newborn from too much noise or stimulation and I willingly hovered on the edge of the gathering all day long.

Thankfully, I was able to nip out to feed Ned in the privacy of the house or garden, but how I longed to be at home quietly with my baby and family. No other non-obligatory social gathering, no matter how wonderful, would have interested me in the slightest!

Our life does change for baby

Whether we like it or not, having a baby means compromise.  It means putting someone else's needs first. 

It means getting up to do the graveyard shift, it means wiping poo from bottoms and wearing someone else's projectile vomit.  But 80% of the time (the other 20% is when we can't stand up for lack of sleep!), we do this happily and willingly. 

Having a child means our priorities change. It is less about us having a glass of wine in a city bar and more about family meals around the table.  Yes, every member of the family must have some of their needs met, but not necessarily every one.  We get to choose our own limits and boundaries, what we keep in our lives, and what we willingly, for a time, give up.   Highlight- FOR A TIME. 

I hold heartfelt concern for a mother who doesn't seem to be able to forgo her own needs for even the shortest time.  Surely, it can't be difficult to place the needs of our newborn, and their need for us, at the top of our priorities for twelve short weeks. 

Whether three months, 5 years or until entry into school, surely we owe our children, these ones we birth out of choice, this consideration.

What do you think???

 

All of this mind-full chatter has once again ignited my thinking about baby moons, perpetual movement, air travel, living outside of town and the quandry of attention deficit disorder.  More tomorrow...

And, then all those delicious things I promised you!

How to's, story inspirations, and festival roundup photos.

Come back and visit soon!!

Sing while you bake!

I believe in letting children join in as soon as possible.

Not just in the 'nice' tasks such as baking and bread making, but in helping you to hang out washing, sweep floors, wash windows, polish tables- in fact, just about anything.

Children love to pass you pegs, stir the pot, sweep the floor, sweep stones, pick up sticks for the fire and pick herbs from the garden.  To children, this work is play. 

I have no concern in the early years about the outcome of their work.  I don't care if they make more mess than I had at the start. I strive to, (and mostly succeed) in letting it go!! 

All I want is their happy engagement in the task.

Because, children who 'do work' love work. It becomes part of their everyday enjoyment of life, rather than a dull chore they must do. And this is a healthy attitude to cultivate.

It always helps to sing while you work!

Just as a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, so a song can entice even the most reticent of children. 

Here is a song I like to use when baking: 

(My copy is handwritten with no reference to the original author, so big apologies but again, if you know where it comes from, please do let me know so I can post the source.)

"The Baking Song"

Sing, sing, sing of the muffin baking

d         b     a    a   a     b a     g  g

Sing, sing, sing  of the biscuit making

d        b      a    a   a     ba      gg

Sing of the eggs, the fruit and the flour

g      g   g     d      d   d      b    a    g

Sing of the winter feast hour

d      b   a    d b     a        a

Sing of the stirring, sing of the mixing

g       g   g    dd       d    b   a     gg

Sing of the finger licking

d      b   a    dba   gg

Sing, sing, sing of the feast we are making

d        b      a    a   a    b     a    a     gg

sing, sing, sing of sharing our baking

d       b    a       a    bb    a       gg

Storytelling Workshop with Sandra Frain

Recently, I have been organising the next gathering for our local Steiner-waldorf inspired teaching colleagues.

This coming Saturday, we are lucky enough to have Sandra Frain (my friend and inspiration) to join us once again to share some storytelling magic.  This meeting is our biggest one yet, with 45 attendees!!

There are people coming out of the woodwork!

The North coast region covers from Mackay down to Byron Bay, including Bribie Island, Noosa, Brisbane, Gold Coast, Lillian Rock and Uki but our Coffs Harbour friends are coming up too! Wonderful!!

As Sandra says, we will 'romp in the Kingdoms of Nature with Story, song, Everyday ceremony and Biodynamic Activity!"  Sounds like lots of fun!!!

These kinds of meetings are nourishing for the child within us all.  Even if I never work in early childhood again, I won't miss a gathering. I learn more and more about myself each time,  and love that this knowledge helps me to be a better, more present and conscious parent, mentor and friend to people in my life.  I am also supported in retaining and deepening my artistic approach to daily living. 

And, it is great fun to be with a whole lot of amazing, youthful, exuberant, life loving women (and the odd man!) who laugh from their bellies! 

I can't wait.

This month through September is a time of complete nourishment. 

It is a time to go back to basics. To fill days with artistic endeavour, deep conversation, family, children, laughter, sunny skies, warmer temperatures and car journeys. 

All my favourite things, other than chocolate and tea, in the world.   

The 'festivally' was fabulous as expected, (a huge turnout and lots of familiar faces, delicious food and good laughs!) and I took lots of photos to share with you all later this week!!  And today was birthday time- a 50th and a 1st.  Busy days! Happy Birthday Charlie and Kip.  Lovely to celebrate with you!!

The computer visits the doctor tomorrow to hopefully get rid of a few bugs.

Then, it is time to fire up some more creative sparks with photos and how-to's galore...

Happy, Happy, Happy!!!

A Winter - Spring nature table

Mother earth is welcoming some new helpers who help her nurture the plants and animals above ground.

The first 'ray' of light streams into the underground to entice the bulbs to break through the earth with their pretty flowers.

Isn't Mother Earth, made by Sydney-based Maria Borrelli, of Heartfelt Designs, just beautiful?

Mother Earth, like Moondew mama's, is busy knitting.  I love the detail of this doll.

Her real knitting is on tiny toothpicks!!

And these two root children are her constant companions.

They are just two brown beads glued one on top of the other.  A circle of brown lycra cotton is glued over the bottom bead and gathered at the neck to cover the body.  A second circle is laid over the top of the head as a coat, tucked under around the face and stitched to the base for extra hold.

Simple but clever and super cute too!

These would make a great birthday gift.  You could also cover seven of them in the colours of the rainbow to make a set of 7 gnomes for a story.

A Woman of Substance Award for MamaMoontime

Big huge thank you's to Kat at the The Awakened Heart blog for nominating MamaMoontime for this gorgeous award!  I love it!  And congratulations on the birth of baby Finn. He IS gorgeous!!

Almost-springtime well wishes for your whole family. 

So, this award has three requirements.

1.Thank the blogger that gave you the award.

2.Sum up your blogging philosophy, motivation, experience, using 5 words.

3. Pass the award on to 5 fabulous bloggers with substance.

So, in five words, (how will I ever do that????) here I am.

Firing Up Creative Sparks Everywhere!

(I hope it is working!!)

Now, in the same spirit, I am lucky enough to pass this award onto five of my faves. 

I love seeing awards on blogs, and I am always motivated to visit the links of the people you love, because I figure, if you love them, I will too!  And I usually do! 

This time, though, rather than the usual suspects (most of whom many of you know) I am bestowing the gift onto five new finds that are inspiring me right now! 

( In fact, my favourites list was becoming so long and cluttered, that I started a new subcategory- My favourite blogs July-September 2010 just for a bit of clarity!)

Here we go!

Redbeet Mama

Wabi-Sabi Wanderings

Beach Vintage

Teaching Handwork

She likes Cute

Enjoy the links!!

And thank you again, Kat.

A Starry Winter game for young children

Winter is drawing to a close in our region.  Actually, we don't really have a true winter at all, but our mild evenings and cooler days are already retreating and soon the full force of spring will be upon us.

The birds are already out and about, and so are many of the flowering blossoms.

Beautiful, it is true, but I do slightly pine for a few more cold days, where I can rug up and wear my stockings and long boots. 

So, in an ode to the final days of winter, we embrace all things moon and stars and the short-lived darkness.

We sing a favourite song of mine and make it into a "Star game", where two children hold a silver or gold 'rain' of stars.  As they walk around the circle, they shake the starry 'rain' (lots of silver or gold tinsel attached to the end of a piece of dowel) across their way and gently over the heads of their friends. 

They choose a friend to have the next turn and pass their starry wand to them.  

The two children then skip merrily off to washing hands in preparation for morning tea.

This is the song:

I wander, I wander

From heaven high, I wander

There came the little twinkling stars,

a-shining on from yonder

Shining stars, shine down on me

Bestow your gifts upon me

And in the darkest wintery nights,

I'lll find my way back to thee.

We painted our own starry wands to take home too!

A Steiner Waldorf-inspired approach to Birthday Celebrations

My latest article is over at Hello, Charlie!

It is a few thoughts on birthday celebrations, and how we might make them a little more meaningful in today's world.  We have such an opportunity to make a big difference in the way we celebrate with our children.

Have a read.

I'd love to know what you think!!

What do you do to celebrate?

Please leave me a comment if you can...

A splendid few days in sunny Sydney...

Who can resist $25 (Yes! $25!!) airfares??

Not the traveller in me, that is for sure!

Five days of play in Sydney was on the cards, a chance to catch up with family, shop and finally visit the baby elephants at Taronga Zoo. 

First stop- Kinokuniya in the city.

Lots of dollars later, I was the proud owner of two Japanese magazines, a stamp set and a drawing book.

(Tip: One of these things is my next giveaway- check back on Friday!)

The Queen Victoria Building is the centre of my Sydney universe.

My dream is to have my first book launch (when, not if!, it happens!!) in the high tea rooms on the top floor. Decadent, indeed! 

I love the vintage elevator in this building. I ride in it even when I don't really need to!

Ned and Henrietta wanted ice-cream holiday food.  Who can resist on holiday?

Henri is still dreaming of her caramel crunch thing...

There was lots of public transport- buses, trains, a ferry too.  For a Gold Coaster, this is part of the fun.

I think it might have been the highlight of Ned's week!

There was cousin love too! 

Gee, I love family.  I really do. So many shared memories, and so many more to make...

One day was dedicated to visiting the new abodes of my Aunty & Uncle, and cousin Brooke too.

A change of bus at Chatswood was heaven sent.  We found 'pan' (bread) shops galore!

Sweet red bean, green tea, chocolate swirl- oh the many varieties... So lacking up here.

Loving the new deck! 

And finally the zoo!!

The two babies were unbelievable- Miracles (the smaller of the two) jumping and chasing his older cousin Luk-chai, running in water, splashing, chasing the hose.  Super playful.   I could have spent all day here.

The best thing though- brother and sister love. 

No matter the difficulties we have at times, the love remains and grows from both sides. 

This is truly heaven. 

365 Days of Gratitude

 A friend (and Moondew mama) of mine Felicity is currently creating a photo-journal of gratitude, inspired by
Hailey Bartholomew

Read more about the original "365 Days of Gratitude" project here

(as taken today by Felicity)

Today, Felicity posted about me!  How sweet!  I am chuffed!! Really, Truly.  It is so nice to know that you make a difference to someone, and to hear about it first hand.  I think we should do this more often.  Felicity gave me a wonderful gift through her gratitude today.  Thank you!!

Anyway, if you would like to read what she wrote, please visit here!
I'm reposting it here as the link wouldn't work.  Thanks for letting me know Nina!

Day 19 - Amber Greene (and Neddie)



Amber is the axis upon which many beautiful worlds spin. Thie extraordinary creator is our Moondew playgroup leader who opens her home every week to create with us, imitate a precious way of being to our children (and the parents), encourage us to enter into our creative space, honour our motherhood, share of herself so honestly, and open her heart and home to us as friends. Amber is community, spirit, intention, love, intuition and guidance. There's always a friendly invitation to dinner, parent talks, and even chic nights. She's always sending us links to fantastic events, magazines, forums, websites, and posts a variety of straight forward creative ideas. She is the epitome of buddhist speech - always practicing words which are kind, true, necessary. Of anyone I have ever met, Amber has been the most in tune with embodying a gentle, loving and creative motherhood. And thanks to Ned who always shares his house, things, and mama with us - you are a gem Neddie.


20th August 2010


Gee, I'm still goose pimply! My husband is too!
What a wonderful thing to live up to.   I hope I can!

Organic Fruit and Vegetable Deliveries

I have earmarked next Saturday to spend time starting small with my edible garden.  In the meantime, I have been seriously looking into organising a delivery box of organic fruit and vegetables.  It has been on my to-do list for many years, but due to cost, sheer laziness and a love of picking out my own, I haven't bothered.  Many of my friends are long-term converts to organic deliveries already so I see what lovely things they receive to eat!  Recently, though I have found a few new sources that I am going to look into.


An organic farm at Murwillumbah is now delivering to the coast. You can find out more details by visiting Tweed Valley Organic Food


Small, practical steps to make life, and the earth, a little happier!!

The Power of Community

Kim and Troy are two wonderful Gold Coasters joined in a mission to bring informative and current documentaries to local audiences. 

Life Changing Docos has been running since early this year.

Each month, the organisers seek to show a contemporary take on issues of prominence in the world today.

Not only that, the doco nights are about building community, offering organic food, talking and sharing ideas and being with other like minded people.

I've been trying to get there since its inception, but last night was my first visit. I've since put it on my monthly calendar and am determined to get there each month. 

(Even last night's calamitous panel session didn't put me off)

I'd encourage all Gold Coasters to come along!! 

I thought I might know half the audience, living this natural living kind of lifestyle and being involved in a Waldorf school that expouses healthy living ideals but I was pleasantly surprised to find I only recognised three familiar faces.  That means, a whole lot of people coming from out of the woodwork who are interested in this kind of idea too!  Even more impressively, a big section of last night's audience was over 50. 

I don't know why that was.  But, it was heartening to see others who are seeking community, realising that a life of living only for one's ego and self gain is not all the only way to happiness.  I hope so.

Before the film, Kim shared a few facts.

Did you know that in Australia, ONE farmer (of traditional methods) commits suicide EACH DAY. 

That is shocking and definitely not on.   Huge mounting debts, lack of rain, lack of subsidies and lack of fair return for their work join together to create huge stresses.  7000 odd farmers walk off their farms each year under the strain.  Not to mention the huge toll on their health and that of their families through the overuse of toxic chemicals. It is just not sustainable.

The other big thing for me was hearing that 60% of my food dollar is spent on transportation and handling.  That means $60 out of every $100 could be saved by going direct to the farm gate!

I'm getting better at avoiding supermarkets, and now I have even more reason to stay away.

And then there was the documentary.  

The film, The Power of Community, was a summary of the changes in Cuba since the early 1990's when trade embargoes were placed on the country.  Faced with a sudden drop in commodities such as petrol, oil, food, manufacturing hardware and machinery parts, life as the Cuban people knew it had to change.

Power outages were common, there was no petrol for cars or buses, and the biggest difficulty of all was that food became scarce. Food rationing was introduced as a means of preventing some way of regulating food distribution.  1000's of bicycles were imported from China and people took to the streets on bikes in droves. Town planning moved with the times, and introduced planned communities with access to universities, parks, shops and services in the local area in a bid to satisfy the needs of the citizens.  

The people of Cuba began to take back every available bit of dirt and fill it with food.  By necessity, food forests and vegetable plants began to thrive on rooftops, in former derelict spaces, on street corners and in backyards.  People and farmers returned to simple values and natural ways of doing things.  Organic farming practices grew as farmers could no longer afford pesticides or even import them.   Tractors became redundant and many farmers returned to traditional farming methods such as using oxen to plough the fields.  The result was astounding.   Farmers became some of the wealthiest people in the land.  The traditional Cuban diet changed in response to what was available and health benefits were immediate due to the increase of eating fresh fruits and vegetables.  Community grew around the farmers fresh produce markets and people began to share and swap food. 

Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful.

One of the biggest changes with this kind of farming is that it is more labour-intensive. More than 20% of the population now works the land, as with traditional farming methods, human hands are needed to take the place of tractors and huge machinery.   But the soil, and therefore the food plants themselves, thrive with the love of the humans. 

For years, I have been meaning to 'plant my vegetable garden', but I always get sidetracked with writing and spending all my spare time on my books and articles.  We have made a few not-so-very-successful attempts.   I have spent days deep in dirt, watched my husband build a no-dig garden bed, set up compost piles (the dogs loved that!), begun a worm farm at least three times, attended workshops, planted seeds, watered plants, let the lettuce go to seed, and knocked our no-dig garden bed over again (it was too far from the house to be handy).

I am a bit nervous to be honest, about eating the food I grow.  I want to get it right, but panic that I might do something that makes the food inedible or poisonous!  Sounds silly, doesn't it. 

But it is even more silly to eat fruits and vegetables from unknown or compromised sources.

Really, don't you think?

I do not come from a family of food growers, although my dad is fabulous with Australia native tree species! so it is all new to me.  My mother-in-law though, eats her own tomatoes on toast daily and has about 10 big pots of them on the go.  And both my sister in law's kiwi gardens are full of herbs, spices, strawberries, lettuce, potatoes and beetroot. It helps to grow up with it I think. And I want this to be Ned's reality (and the rest of our family's) too.

Last night's film and the discussion panel afterwards, really made me think a little more deeply about food security and energy resources.  Growing our own food, or being involved with a group of people growing our own food and sharing, really is the only way to really have food security, and all things being as they are in our world today, it is probably the single most important thing anyone can do to ensure a good life for their family.

I'm determined over the next few weeks to start simple.

A few tomatoes, and maybe some lettuce. 

And maybe trying to find someone who can teach me a few simple tricks on how to keep bugs away.

Do you grow your own food?

What is the best tip you have?

I'd love to know!!

Winter Queen workshop wrap up.

Monday was the night for Winter Queen creation.

We wrapped, tucked, sewed, stitched, plaited, formed and decorated all night long!

Here are the Beautiful Queens themselves, with their dolls in hand!!

They look like the Dancing Princesses, don't you think!

(Perhaps the other seven were already at the ball!!)

The Rainbow Queen was just fit for a little 5 year old princess herself!

This Queen waved her magic wand.

And no one could resist this one's beautiful up-do, complete with a pearl choker and delicate dancer hands!!

What a lovely evening of craft, creativity and chatter!!

Cath's fabulous ideas for a young girl's party!

Ned and I spent the most delightful blue sky 'day of perfection' Sunday morning at Abbey's birthday party.

Abbey is turning five!

It sure was a glorious day for it, as we sat underneath a shade cover at Flat Rock park, right on a strip of clean white Tugun beachfront.  

I'm biased I know, but honestly, we have the MOST beautiful beaches that I have ever seen, right on our back door step.  The water this morning was flat, with just a tiny frizzle of a wave rolling in for the odd bodyboarder.  A sailing boat magically appeared and came within metres of the shore, towing his tinnie behind him.

It was so beautiful it was beyond a picture postcard.

So, the mood was set.

Abbey's mum, my friend Cath, a highly creative Mama herself and with child in utero to boot, outdid herself with sweet activities for the children.

Cath provided the children with a small terracotta plant pot and all the things to help decorate them and each child was set free to make their masterpiece. 

Glitter, shiny stickers and pens.

The children were in heaven!

When the pots were dry, Cath's husband Scott helped each child to choose a flower plant and helped pot it up for them to take home.  A lovely idea indeed!

Later, on the white sand, they cordoned off an area for a treasure hunt. The children were then let loose to dig for, and find, at least five gems of their very own.  The crystals glimmered under the shining sun.  Real Magic indeed!  Later, these went into a party bag along with a tissue paper wrapped slice of agate and purple and pink balloons too.  Ned loved this!

Cath made Abbey this Toadstool house cake.

Cute hey! 

But before the cake, the children were treated to a feast of colour and taste.

Cheese triangles, dips, olives, carrot and celery sticks, a huge fruit platter, apricot coconut slice and a bowlful of passionfruits just waiting to be guzzled down.

I love this kind of food at a child's party. 

I'm no food saint but an offering of healthy food sure makes life with a young one that little bit easier.

The children can eat whatever they choose without fear of a sugar tantrum and Mama stays happy too!

And the children DID eat! 

That is the thing when real, healthy food is on the menu most of the time.

The children know no different, and a treat, such as that yummy butter cake, really is a treat!

If you look closely, you can see the birthday girl herself, smiling in the sun.

Happy Birthday Abbey!

We hope you had a lovely party day!!

We sure did!